Another Bank

Another bank? Yes, another one. This you must read in regard to Barclays. In the last one year or so we have been bombarded with banks KCB, Global Trust, Fina Bank, UBA, Equity Bank, Ecobank and the latest addition to the pack, Bank PHB who’ve bought out Orient Bank.

Now, many Ugandans, I inclusive wonder why the Ugandan market is so aggressively being pursued by foreign banks especially the Nigerians. What do they know that they’re not telling us? In all of their interviews, these banks’ top officials say they see immense potential in Uganda and the East African region as a whole. If they were American, we would say they are on their quest for world domination! But they are our Naija and Kenyan brothers so let’s wait and see.

I have heard and I don’t remember who from exactly that they are mainly targeting oil wealth. It is said that they believe that in 5 years, the oil dollars / shillings will be flowing on the streets of Kampala. The reasoning behind the influx now is that if you already have an account with a given bank for 5 years or more, you are most likely to transact all your business through that bank, right? If such is the case then they really are more hopeful than some of us but still, I wonder, what do they know that we don’t?

So what exactly are they offering? I believe KCB had its niche with the Kenyans especially students of Kenyan origin in Ugandan institutions of learning. They also hit it big with the business community as many have dealings in Mombasa and Southern Sudan where the bank has branches. And then there was the Safaricom IPO, the bank actually offered people loans to buy shares so in they went running.

UBA’s premier offering was its freedom account, free banking they said. Free, that’s the catch phrase we Ugandans like to hear. What they were referring to was that for this particular account, there is no minimum opening balance, no monthly charges, etc. In short, if you deposit, 50,000 today then you’d still have the same account balance in 6 months, that’s if you didn’t withdraw or deposit more. Very welcome for people like myself who are completely convinced that the bank is committing robbery especially whenever I walk out of the ATM.

As for Equity and Fina Bank, I believe they have their niche in the SMEs and low income earners but they haven’t really said anything, thus we wait. Global trust, Ecobank we’ll just have to wait and see, right?

Ecobank had its official launch on 19th February 2009. Which Ecobank? Is it the same one that we saw on Big Brother and on Africa Magic, you ask? Yes, the very same one. Well, the official launch went past everyone who was watching, waiting. This was simply because of how it was done. The bank’s management decided to have a cocktail party at Serena hotel.

If you didn’t hear about it, well, perhaps that’s because it was not really a public launch (strictly by invite), the only public presence we could see were white Ecobank balloons tied using ribbons to shrubs on some of the city’s roundabouts. And you were lucky if you saw them because as the day went on, I believe most of them had succumbed to the wind such that by the time we were heading back home, there was one solitary one floating around the round about. Seeing this, my friend commented that it looked like it had fallen off the truck they were using to deliver them to a certain venue.

Life, oh life

Life oh life......that song by Gabrielle keeps playing on and on in my mind.
The last few months have been extremely hard on me professionally and yesterday was not too good of a hard day. A friend of mine reminded me yesterday of the saying that if it can go wrong, then it will go wrong. I totally agree. Of late, everything that can go wrong, has gone wrong and i mean everything.

Ah well, Christmas is here. Hope that will help to make things a little better though I'm not feeling any of the good cheer, I'm certainly not in a festive mood. Don't see anything to celebrate, joy to the world...but no joy in my life.....so when i walk into Shoprite and its all covered in tinsel with background music to match, i want to scream and tear out my little tufts of hair.

Then the emails, merry Christmas all over the place but I'm thinking to myself, if there's no food, water or electricity, the whole merriment thing will be grossly dampened and so its back to the grindstone to try and make that money coz i ain't got it...

December is the month of weddings here in Kampala. I hear it is because its easier to get time off, more people will attend your wedding including friends and family from abroad. So there are wedding everywhere you look, invites all over the place. In fact, you have to carefully select whose wedding to attend as you more often than not have more than one to attend on a given Saturday or even Friday, perhaps, Wednesday... a friend of mine is getting married on 31st December, starting 2009 as Mrs is the plot.

Another friend of mine asked me earlier this year if I'd be a bridesmaid at her wedding. I said ye, thought it was a joke but the wedding is next weekend and i have tried as much as i can to get out of this bridesmaid thing and i have failed. I have to get fitted for my pink dress, shoes, blah blah. Am totally freaked out but I'm doing this for her. I keep having the feeling that on D-day i might become a runaway bridesmaid. See, I'm not comfortable being in the spotlight, i hate cameras, light, people's eyes...OK,I'm really shy, no one sees that. The whole confident look is merely a facade to hide the truth....Now,I'm imagining what the hairdresser is going to do to my beloved, uncomplicated dreadlocks, what the so called beautician will do to my very very complicated, sensitive and unyielding skin, all these things are freaking me out.

OK, Beyonce's video is on the TV right now, you know the one where she's wearing nothing but a modified swimming costume for lack of a better description. Single ladies, the song is called. Every time i watch this video, i am truly amazed by the creature that's Beyonce. She has so much confidence and energy that someone in the office i have temporarily moved into is convinced that she's on steroids or something but surely something. I am quite certain that if anyone wanted to lose lots of weight as well as their wits, all they have to do is watch the video enough, master the moves and go on to perform the same moves in heels every day and voila, supermodel bod and perhaps similar brain matter too......

Come to think of it, I'm thinking of dropping a few kilos so I'm going to get myself a full DVD of Beyonce's videos because they are all workout videos as far as I'm concerned. I have some pairs of heels that i could use thought I'm not sure my ankles will survive the torture. Well, you never know till you try, right? Am off to find that DVD collection.

Taxis!!!!!

I am not sure whether it still exists but there used to be a feature in one of our dailies with someone narrating their experiences of our public transport system. These taxi journals seemed very cheerful compared to the experience I have but perhaps, the writer is just a cheerful soul and I’m not.

I don’t know if it’s just me but I seem to have the most horrible experiences, from near death to smelly armpits and crazy neighbours. At this point, I would like to issue a disclaimer, I am not a snob, I have used taxis for years but some things are too annoying and depressing.

On Monday evening, I left the office with a colleague. In an attempt to get home early, I decided not to wait for a ride from a certain good samaritan who usually saves me from sitting in a taxi. So we take a taxi into town. This particular taxi was to take us to the old taxi park where we were to board taxis to our respective areas of abode. As they are wont to do, the taxi driver decided to head on through Kampala road as there was traffic jam at down the road from steers and also down the road from radio one.

Passengers were requested to disembark and walk mpola mpola to the taxi park. I decided to walk to a nearby stage and wait for taxis to my home rather than push and shove in the park. After about 30 minutes, one did finally appear and to my delight, there was a free seat in the front. In I hopped, my heart filled with relief.

This however was very short-lived. No sooner had I settled into my seat than I started getting weird glances from my neighbour. I chose to ignore the strange man staring at me from head to toe, to my own detriment. This should have been my cue to jump right out but I am a patient person, right? I choose to believe that people are inherently good and mostly sane.

I was very, very, oh so very wrong. As we went on our journey from kampala road heading towards Ntinda, I experienced what I can only describe as torture for lack of a better word. This guy sitting next to me started off by rubbing his leg against mine. I don’t mean once in a while, I mean all through. I tried to ignore him and keep praying that my stop would come fast enough or that his would.

I almost jumped out of the window most of the time and I hated every single stop we made. I wanted to switch seats so badly but there was no free seat at any one point to switch to. I wanted to scream, in fact, I was screaming so loudly in my head; I was surprised that no one could hear.

I had had enough when his hand started roving, caressing my thigh…..thank God, I was wearing pants. I yelled maso awo so fast and loud and jumped out so fast that everyone thought I had ants in pants. I got out of the taxi at the Kisementi stage next to Zinellos, I couldn’t take it anymore. I thought of waiting amongst the crowd for another taxi and the preceding scenario played back in my mind. This is when I decided to walk home. I was wearing really high heels, over 4 inches but I didn’t mind. I just started walking. I walked till I got home and I didn’t feel the pain or I did and it was nothing compared to the horror of being felt up by a strange looking, smelly stranger. So, I walked home from Kisementi to Bukoto.

I had had it and I felt like I only had myself to blame, see, I hate taxi, I detest them. In fact, if I don’t have a car, my mode of transportation is boda bodas. All the boda boda riders around my home know me so well that they even transport me for credit. And they’ve taken me everywhere, bunga, mukono, lubowa, you name it, I’ve been there on a boda boda. For the record, I’ve had so many small accidents on them, 3 nearly serious and one major one where I ended up with a broken wrist, broken ankle and a cut on my forehead.

The difference with boda bodas is that you only have one person to deal with, no noise, sweaty smelly people, long stops, weird conductors, etc and they are really fast. Me likes speed, I am grossly impatient. Of course, they are more expensive but I would gladly pay whatever they charge to avoid taxis.
So, I avoid taxis as much as I possibly can and thus yesterday, I ended up staying in the office till 9pm, all in the name of waiting for a lift. I have resolved that until I have a car fulltime, boda boda it is. Which reminds me, I need to call up Bright, my almost everyday boda guy and discuss a retainer………….

Loving life

Its friday, its going to rain but i am just happy, i don't care.

Its been an extremely long week for me, have barely slept these last two weeks and i've been working, monday through to sunday so i am really glad the week is over and i can get some rest this weekend.



I'm also happy because the kids are home from school so i can see my little loveling. He's in boarding school so i miss him terribly and so i try to make up for all the lost time. So, no working weekends or late nights when he's around.

OBAMA!!!!

I am suffering from a serious case of Obamania. I am beyond ecstatic, America has its first black president and my hero has moved a little higher in my estimation. I admire the man for his charisma and his oratory skills. Whenever I hear a speech of his, I am left spell bound. He embodies hope for me. Now I know that if you believe, then you can achieve. There are no boundaries other than those you set for yourself. I know I can be anything I want to be, I can do anything I want to do. He truly is a hero to me. Even if he had not won the election, I would still feel the same. The power of belief!!!!

Another long day at work.

Its past 8:30pm and I am still in the office. This is not unusual for me, however, when i left my last job, I promised myself that I wouldn't work so hard. Yet, I'm barely hanging on....here I am once again, I'm torn into pieces......Sorry, I digress, that is actually the first line of the chorus to "Behind these Hazel eyes" by Kelly Clarkson. I listen to Rock a lot as I work, well, all the time.

I was saying that yet here I am once again working late. My fingers hurt, my head hurts, my knees, my eyes.....in short, there is no part of my anatomy that isn't feeling it. My eyes, knees and back are seriously threatening to let go but still i press on. If you see any typos, i beg to be forgiven.

Anyway, i am wondering why i am literally killing myself on a daily basis. Is it in an effort to climb up the career ladder? Is it to make more money, that should come with climbing the social ladder, right? Then hopefully move on into the state of comfortable living. And by this I don't mean living in opulence, i mean the state of not staring in horror whenever i see my landlords caller ID flash across the screen of my phone. In fact, i look forward to the day, i don't have a landlord anymore, mine thinks he is a calender. From the 25th of each month through to the last day of the month, he keeps calling everyday and the conversation goes something like this;

"Hi, how are you? today's the 27th.....I just thought you should know. Anyway, i hope i will be hearing from you soon" All this while i am thinking, gun please, i need to shoot someone through the phone. Of course, I know what date it is. There are calenders everywhere i turn, newspapers, etc basically, i know what date it is because i have to think of handing over a very huge chunk of my pay check to you. You don't have to remind me of the fact that i will soon be penniless and you penniful!!!!

Enough of the raving, my girlfriends and i are a very ambitious bunch and i am quite sure that the discussions we have would be shocking for most people if they heard them. Well, for the most part, its legal stuff but then you have days when we are all so broke that we plot bank robberies and schemes of the Temangalo magnitude and sometimes, growing heroin, cocaine or whatever ( hee hee, J, i haven't forgotten). We do this whenever we are really broke, which is a lot and then we revert to the legal money making schemes but that never quite seems to work because they all need capital, ie; money.

Lately, i look around myself and wonder whether there is really a legal way of making a lot of money in this town. Anyway, i don't want to make a lot, just enough...but then again, that's relative.....
Anyway, i have come to the conclusion that if i get the opportunity to do a Temangalo, i will carefully explore the opportunity, of course with the intention of taking it. The trick is not to get caught....
Like one supposedly bright radio DJ once said, but what's wrong with taking a gift that you've been offered?? Its a crime if you ask for it, but if you are given that its ok, right? Food for thought!!!!

BBA3: First impressions

I never ever thought i would be blogging about Big brother Africa. Perhaps because i don't get the point or like whatever it is anyway. As such, i didn't watch much of the first two "seasons" save for the highlights. I didn't even know that BBA3 was starting this last Sunday so i missed the opening ceremony or whatever it is called. Then there I am on Tuesday night flipping through the channels, as always and there are a bunch of people in blue overalls making a racket, then it hits me. I tried watching for a while and i was really bored. I haven't been able to watch for more than 5 minutes at a time but being idle is a dangerous thing, i have watched quite a bit of the show due to the fact that i have spent 90% of this last week on my couch. Today, i actually watched about 30 mins worth of the show and the housemates were doing this weekly task. A presentation of sorts about their respective nations of origin and i must say, i did not expect some of them to be as articulate as they were but surely, Munya the Zimbabwean takes the cake.

I know i am supposed to be patriotic but there is a lot missing from the Ugandan guy Morris. He seems kind of lost whenever there is a conversation going on and hardly contributes. Last night the housemates were discussing the global economic crisis in relation to Africa and my dear brother Morris looked on and kept yawning as if they were talking about rocket science or astro physics. I am sensing an immense deficiency in the upstairs department. Needless to say, the other housemates seem really intelligent, well read, well travelled, well spoken etc in comparison to him. Anyway, he is trying to get by on his looks and the fact that he seems to get along with just about everyone. Oh and the tanzanian chic Latoya has a thing for him.

As of now, i would say i like all the guys except TK who seems a bit aloof. The guys are fun and entertaining and i really must say, not too hard on the eyes. Ricco-the fun loving Angolan, Munya-the articulate, intelligent Zimbabwean, Uti, the entertaining Nigerian. Am still watching and analysing the characters but i must say amongst the girls, Sheila the Kenyan is really loud!!! Constantly talking her mouth off, using foul language, insulting others, quite obnoxious if you ask me. Don't think she will last very long. Of course, they'll vote off the boring girls while they keep Sheila for entertainment, then off she'll go. I kind of hope she goes first but we might be bored, well at least we'll still have Uti, Ricco and Mimi to keep us entertained.